The idea that some women are multi-orgasmic was long considered a myth, or possibly a wind-up. Surely, there's no such thing, we all thought. Who are these people, these mutants, these XXX-Men with sexual superpowers? Well, hold onto the headboard because it turns out that not only are multiple orgasms possible, there exists such a thing as The Super Orgasm.
A new Channel 4 documentary of the same name has discovered that a mega climax is totally possible. And we’re not just talking a yawn-some, pedestrian handful of orgasms. No, we’re talking about coming up to one hundred times in one go – orgasms on orgasms on orgasms, the brain's pleasure centers lighting up like a haunted pinball machine.
The prospect of multifarious 'O's brings up many questions, mainly “How do I get me one of those?”. But also, what exactly does a super orgasm look like? How does it feel? When you give or get one, does a big band storm into the room, marching round your bed playing 'In The Mood' by Glenn Miller? And once you know how it's done, can you add it to your list of skills on LinkedIn?
The creator of the Channel 4 doc, Liz Friend, was determined to remove the stigma attached to female sexual pleasure, and by studying a group of five women who are lucky enough to experience super orgasms she hopes to show other women how they can, too.
This sexual Holy Grail all comes down to science, y'see. The super orgasm is linked to higher levels of oxytocin – known as the “love hormone”, which is released when you make a bond with someone. The study also revealed that by exposing participants to pornography and testing their physiological responses in what is known as an ‘arousal booth,' those more susceptible to mega Os were turned on more easily than others. (We’re all secretly hoping arousal booths are sold in flat packs at Ikea, right?)
The women were also found to be much more relaxed during sex, and weren’t solely focused on orgasming. Which is no easy feat, but it totally makes sense – a watched pot doesn’t boil, after all, especially with it's not wearing any clothes.
The study made use of a multitude of tests to verify the realness of the super orgasm, including a rather risky experiment that saw one woman masturbating in an MRI machine – not the easiest of tasks if you’re heavily reliant on a metal vibrator, taking the solo sesh into danger wank territory.
Coming up with a plan on how to force your brain to produce more oxytocin might prove fruitless, but – glory be – the researchers recommended that the best way to reach the Holy Grail of orgasms is to practice yoga and relaxation. With that in mind, we spoke to Maria Porsfelt, Tantric Teacher at Tara Yoga Centre about how you and your partner can achieve a super orgasm together. So go grab a pen and paper – you’re going to want to take some notes.
Super Orgasms, Step-By-Step
First things, first: Maria tells us that the best thing you can do when starting to reach for that super O-G is to slow the hell down: “Start with a nice long foreplay, 20-30 mins. This will give the man time to get used to the arousal and the woman has a chance to warm up and relax.”
Maria tells us that a super orgasm is about controlling the whole body so that you don’t just feel the orgasm in your genitals, but all over your body. “Focus on feeling the rising excitement in the genital area but as you do, start to spread that pleasure throughout your body with your mind and breath,” she advises. “This takes practice and a little faith in what you are doing.”
But how will you know if your super orgasm is on its way? Oh-ho-ho, my friend, trust me – you’ll know. You can expect tingling in the arms and legs, dryness of the throat, pleasure in your abdomen and what Maria calls a “dissolving of the body outline.” We’re not sure what that last one means, but we sure are excited to find out.
Once you’ve clocked up half an hour’s worth of foreplay, Maria says it’s important to move to the next stage slowly. Think of your mega ‘gasm as a startled dear: “The more you rush towards super orgasms, the greater the chance you will miss them,” she warns. “The key here is for the woman to learn to relax and abandon and for the man to learn to control his erotic energy without ejaculating.”
Whilst it’s often thought that the way to prolong an orgasm is to think of something that turns you off, like Margaret Thatcher naked or your football team making it to the Super Bowl only to be blown out, Maria says that you need to stay present in order for the super orgasm to work, so steer clear of wandering thoughts.
The key for both of you at this point is to breathe. Just… breathe. Breeeaaathe. “The man can breathe in deeply as he moves in, pause for a moment at full penetration, breathe out deeply as he moves out, pause for another moment and repeat the cycle. Focusing on the breath calms the mind down, gives control over the energies and brings you focus.”
We aren’t sure that happens when a couple super orgasms simultaneously, but we’re pretty sure it involves spontaneously combusting from pure pleasure. If you live to tell the tale, let us know how you get on. Now, we’re off to book a week’s holiday to practice.