Everyone loves sex toys, right? What's not to love? They bring people pleasure; help satisfy lonely people and help add spice to the sex lives of couples.
Well, unfortunately, some people think sex toys are, for some reason, something to be ashamed of. Something to hide away and not talk about. And so long as that's the case, any sex toy owner unfortunately has to live with the reasonable assumption that some people might try to mock or shame them for owning a sex toy, when it's really just a natural part of a healthy sexual existence.
So some smart sex toy manufacturers have made products that are essentially discreet sex toys. Sex toys that you could be staring right at and not even know are sex toys. That's right, we're talking about the high-tech James Bond spy gadgets of the sex toy world. Sex toys that look like tubes of lipstick, simple pieces of jewelry and even a rubber duck.
RELATED: How To Get Her A Sex Toy
So why do you care? Well, if you've been thinking of getting a special someone in your life a sex toy (which, if you haven't, you should — it can be a surprisingly romantic gesture and often bespeaks a guy very comfortable with his sexuality and his talents as a lover) one of these could be a great idea. It says: "I care about your pleasure, but I also care about your privacy." It says: "I love being sneaky with you." It says: "Let's try getting it on in public sometime together."
Whether you're on board by now or not, here's a list of 10 discreet sex toys you wouldn't even know were sex toys:
1. Vibrating Shower Pouf
Don't tell me you're still just rubbing a worn-down bar of soap on yourself when you shower. Well, either way, she's probably using something like this — except it probably doesn't vibrate. Well, the Vibrating Mesh Sponge from Sex in the Shower does just that. Shower sex just got a whole lot more exciting.
$32.60 at Amazon.com
2. Rubber Duckie Vibe
It's a bird! It's a toy! It's a… vibrating massager? Yep, this innocent-looking rubber duckie is actually a very naughty bath accessory. With three different speeds to hit whatever level of vibration a horny bather is looking for, this waterproof and quiet addition to your tub will really bring a smile to your special someone's face.
$22.45 at Amazon.com
3. Lipstick Vibrator
Unfortunately, this won't actually double as a tube of lipstick, but honestly, who cares? It's a discreet-as-hell little bit of magic that'll fit right in in any purse or makeup bag, and, with just a single AAA battery, turn a regular ol' trip to the washroom into a titillating yet sneaky explosion of pleasure.
$10.95 at Amazon.com
4. Mascara Vibrator
Basically the same concept as the lipstick vibrator, the mascara vibrator will fit right in with her other makeup accoutrements (that's a fancy way of saying accessories) and none will be the wiser. Its three-speed motor will give her all kinds of pleasure options for whatever mood she's in — flirty, frisky or raunchy as hell.
$9.98 at Amazon.com
5. Makeup Case Vibrator
The "Make Me Over" vibrator from Bedroom Kandi looks for all the world like the typical compact mirrored makeup case — but it's really a charging station housing a powerful little disc-shaped vibrator with a handy strap to keep it properly anchored during a moment of passion.
$79.00 at Bedroomkandi.com
6. Necklace Vibrator
What's that? A freaking necklace that doubles as a vibrator? The Crave Vesper is possibly the most James Bond item on this list, as it packs a four-speed vibrating motor into a sleek, beautiful stainless steel pendant, and delivers up to 90 minutes worth of purring pleasure in a perfectly inconspicuous package.
$69.00 at Amazon.com
7. Necklace Nipple Vibrator
So-called "foreplay jewelry," the Crave Droplet is a necklace feature a pair of pendants that double as nipple vibrators. She can wear it out and about all day without triggering any suspicion — then transform it instantly into a very teasing toy at the push of a button once you're alone together.
$109.00 at Lovecrave.com
8. Earring Nipple Clamps
The Cleo Nipple Clamp Earrings are the perfect encapsulation of the concept of "hiding in plain sight." Not only do they not look remotely sexual, they're actually really eye-catching and will be sure to attract heaps of compliments. Then, later on when it's just the two of you, they'll be sure to attract heaps of delectable pain as you turn up the BDSM a notch together.
$54.00 at Unboundbox.com
9. Whip Choker
Want to take the BDSM up more than just a notch? Consider the Amelia Whip Choker from Unbound. By day, it's a beautiful yet unassuming choker necklace that "encircles [the] neck to meet in an eyecatching sterling silver pendant." By night… it's a fully functional whip "suited to light BDSM play." And not only is it able to deliver extra kinky thrills as a whip, but anyone who's into choking will likely appreciate the feel of wearing a tight whip necklace, too.
$49.00 at Unboundbox.com
10. Massaging Ring
Available in both silver and gold and as a one-finger or two-finger variant, the Twiggy massage ring features decorative spheres and "provides targeted pressure." For those that don't know, that's code for "feels good when she rubs it on her clitoris."
$37.00 at Unboundbox.com