Alright, tell us the truth: how many random objects have you jerked yourself off to? There’s no judgement on our end (trust us), and the chances are pretty good that if you’ve thought of it, some other dude has thought of it, too. Though you probably didn’t know there was an official name for that bar of soap you masterfully carved for your teenage morning wood showers, DIY fleshlights are not only a thing, but they’re very common, too.
Scratching your head(s) at the term fleshlight? It’s simple: fleshlights are merely male masturbation devices that help men achieve orgasm by mimicking the feel, the suction and the tightness of a woman’s vagina. Depending on what type of texture and pressure gets your rockets going, you might find yourself getting wildly creative with household items for a very sensual purpose.
“Although the price of the actual Fleshlight male masturbation device has come down to just under $65, some guys either do not want to shell out the cash, or simply like to play ‘Inspector Gadget’ in their home workshop and come up with clever ways to combine household items to construct a ‘faux vagina’ to fulfill their masturbatory needs,” sexpert Coleen Singer explains.
Here are some ideas for your next DIY fleshlight masterpiece:
While your girlfriend or your roommate might start to wonder where her pack of sponges went, you can use those nifty dirty dish fighters to fulfill your sexual appetite. But instead of going all middle school on the multi-colored softies, Singer says you can upgrade your fleshlight craft by adding in a Pringles can and a latex glove. “Simply put two sponges facing each other in a Pringles container, pop a latex glove between them, secure the glove to the can with a few rubber bands, get lubed up and go to work,” she says.
If you really want to take it up a notch, do not be afraid to make it a real rocket ship with a vibrator. Singer says to put a small vibrator inside the can to take your orgasm to the next level. Try this one to get started: Power Bullet Mini Vibrator.
Stock Up: Power Bullet Mini Vibrator, $10.95 at AdamEve.com
Next time you are chopping up some vegetables for a salad or an antipasta, leave the largest (and, ahem, ripest) one to the side. This fleshlight is especially recommended for those who suffer from a latex allergy and might not be able to utilize more common supplies needed for an at-home sex toy. The construction? Have a sharp knife (not near there) and go to town. “Simply slice the cucumber in half end to end, scoop of the seeds, and then bind it back together with duct tape and a few rubber bands,” Singer explains. You can also add more lubrication with a condom for this one, if your cucumber starts to lose it is seeds.
Maybe you are not into produce or that smelly thing that gets the grease off your bacon pan on Saturday mornings. No biggie. You can use school supplies (and yep, we honestly mean what you’ll find in the aisle with binders and pens) to create a classic, popular fleshlight. For this one, you just need pipe cleaners, bubble wrap and rubber bands, Singer explains. Depending on the size of your erect member, measure the width and the height of your “tube” and construct it. Just do not forget to use some lube and maybe a condom, because bubble wrap isn’t exactly forgiving.
A Wet Towel and a Condom
When you are in a hurry (and do not have time to follow step-by-step sexual craft instructions), you can simply use a warm, wet towel and a condom to jerk one out. Just make sure to hold the towel tight enough to create the sensation that you are seeking with a masturbation tool. Some added lube could be a benefit, too — so you can move as fast as you want before running out to meet pals or go on a date.
Chicken Breasts (and other meats)
…so you might be more into actual breasts than the ones that you buy and throw into the oven for a weekday dinner, but if you are feeling brave, Singer says some online forums are into using raw meat as a way to masturbate. Though we recommend thoroughly showering after your play time, because although the texture is similar to that of human flesh, it might be a pretty life-like experience. Singer explains a few:
“Buy a package of chicken breasts and first wash thoroughly and peel off the chicken skin. Then microwave the skin for 20 to 30 seconds. That will bring out the natural lubrication of the oils. Slap the skin around your cock and stroke until you cluck,” she advises.
“All you need is a piece of liver, almost thawed, but still a little frozen. Once you can bend the liver, find the middle and use a knife to cut a hole in the center about the size of a dime. Let the liver come to room temperature and then wrap it around your penis. The meat feels like a real pussy, all wet and slippery. Masturbate as you usually would, and just before you ejaculate, make sure the hole in the liver is at the head of your penis to avoid this becoming an even messier cleanup chore,” Singer said.
Liver With An Empty Milk Carton
“Wash out an empty milk carton and buy about 1 lb of raw liver (beef works best). Fill the milk carton with about 1 lb of room temperature liver. Pump away. If you like a rough texture, add oatmeal or even grape nuts to the liver,” she says.
“Take a raw Cornish hen, let it thaw out, and then remove the giblets and innards, then wash it out thoroughly. Set the Cornish hen on the table, drop your pants and pump away,” she says. “You probably want to only try this when home alone to avoid having your partner or a family member walk in and see this spectacle!”
As Singer says above, the best type of fleshlight isn’t one that you make after making pit stops by the grocery, convenience and hardware store, but the one that you can find online or at your local sex shop. With so many types of fleshlights on the market, most of which are inexpensive, you can try a few out to see which ones most closely mimic the kind of fit you need for extended pleasure. Here are a few to get you started:
Fleshlight Stamina Trainer Pack
For: Decreasing Sensitivity
With three different fits for the head, lubricant, a shower mount and a sex toy cleanser, this $105 buy will take your masturbation game from zero to all-star. The nice thing about having variety is that it help guide your next purchase and ultimately, help you discover the right kind of plastic for your bod.
$109.95 at AdamEve.com
Fleshlight Flight: Pilot
Best For: Traveling
If you are on the go a lot for work (or for fun), you might not feel comfortable packing an obvious-looking fleshlight in your carry-on. (Just try explaining that one to TSA, right?) Instead of a toy that looks like skin, this sleek version is a more subtle option that still gets the job done.
$66.95 at Fleshlight.com
Best For: A cooling sensation
Like ice cube play in the bedroom? Or enjoy a cold shower after sex? This sex toy might be your best bet then, since it offers a cooling effect when you use it. And hey, maybe it’ll even build up your endurance for the next time you have intercourse, if you can master an erection, even with the lower temperature.
$84.95 at Fleshlight.com
Fleshlight Sex In A Can
Best For: A gift
Buddy have a bachelor party coming up? This gift might be the essential must-have to get the whole crew laughing their a** off before you go on binge drinking. Made to look like you’re favorite beer, your buddy can admire his trusted brew while imagining wedded life (or well, anything else that turns him on).
$65.95 at Fleshlight.com
Best For: Vibrations
More movement means more intense orgasms, and this fleshlight offers it all. While you’re jerking off, spines along the sleeve will pulse at your directed speed, giving you a whole other meaning to riding dirty.
$109.95 at Fleshlight.com
Best For: Oral sex
For the nights when your girlfriend isn’t in the mood to go to town, or when you’re single and you really miss getting regular BJs, then consider this new buy as a good idea. It’s meant to recreate the feeling of oral sex, complete with suction. Add in some lube to make it extra slippery.
$67.24 at Fleshlight.com
Best For: Customization
Okay, so maybe this is technically DIY, but a little more advanced. Here, you can choose what matters the most to you, from how big and how fast to the lips and the special effects, and, depending on your budget, you can truly go to town creating an at-home vagina that’s just about as perfect as the real thing. And hey, if she’s into it, maybe your girlfriend will help you recreate her own, making sure that no matter what, she’s always on your mind (and in your pants).
Find out more at Fleshlight.com